Kali is Siva's other wife. Siva's first wife was Sati, and she immolated herself to try to bring him into the world. Siva is also maried to Parvati, seen at times as the reincarnation of Sita, and sometimes Durga (although in that case, she tends to become, in effect, Parvati). Parvati is the perfect wife. She suffers through Siva's mood swings. She takes care of the household, she calms him down when he's angry, she has born him children (although not really in the traditional manner, and it is questionable as to whether any of the children are really children of both rather than children of just one), and she takes care of the children. She is the perfect householder. Occasionally Parvati is said to get angry, this anger usually manifests as something external, often as Kali herself. Kali in fact is thought to be the child, or at least a side of Parvati. Parvati was known as the "Dark One" because she was dark skinned, and her husband teased her for such. She went away and had this dark skin removed, and became the "Golden One," the skin left over became Kali, whose name literally means "Dark." This skin of anger of Parvati's is occasionally called upon when Parvati sees something she does not like. Kali also becomes a wife of Siva, forcing Siva into the role of Parvati when dealing with her. Parvati has to calm Siva, but Siva has to calm Kali. Kali appears to be the most powerful figure in this triangle. Siva is eclipsed by his wife. She is more uncontrolable than even he is.
Lilith was Adam's first wife. Adam's last wife, Eve, was more submissive, and more of what Adam wanted. Lilith was Adam's equal. The being that had two halves, that was the hemephrodite adam before there was a male Adam, was composed of the two creatures that were separated into Lilith and Adam. Lilith was the perfect complement to Adam, his "female half." However, Adam was not content with this half of his who was his equal. Since they were both from the same being, and Adam may be seen as the dominant partner in his relationship to Eve, they may have both wanted to dominate the relationship. Lilith wanted power over Adam, and Adam wanted power over her. They were just too much to be together, too much alike and in conflict to be good partners. Lilith realized the relationship was doomed and that Adam wanted dominion over her, and she left. Lilith, the scorned woman, who herself scorned Adam, went off on her own to explore her own life, without Adam. Another woman was created for Adam, this time from a side of a side. The female side had already been removed from Adam, there was less to take from this time, and as such, Eve was not as strong an individual. She did however, seem to inherit his curiousity, perhaps even take it from him, for he had named the animals and every living thing, but after she was created he was not as active a character. She is the one who decided to try the fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and evil, because she was curious. It sounded like a good idea, especailly since Adam had deceived her and told her that she would die even if she only touched the tree, andother way he controlled her. In contemporary culture Lilith has occasionally been linked to the serpent, and usually in this context the snake is good. The snake, Lilith, knows that eating of the tree will not kill them. It might even give her replacement a backbone, and the ability to stand up to Adam.
Both Kali and Lilith are the "other woman." Both of them have a husband who is married to others. Those others are more associated with their husbands than they are. Kali is seen more as a loner, and Lilith is not even in the real cannon of the Bible. Neither of these women fit into the role as wife, both of them are too independant to filfull that role sufficiently.